Evening Standard: "Are you being served in your local high street?"

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"I am an instinctive shopper and an impatient one. I don’t want to queue, I don’t want to go from minus-2 sleet outside, to the sweltering fan-heat of the store, 

"I don’t want to face hordes of people slamming a heavy swing door in my face, I am too lazy to try anything on (blame Hong Kong) and I never ever want to be told I can get only a credit note if I decide to return it.

"My best friend Jojo is horrified when I confide these thoughts about the high street to her. 'That’s so dangerous,' she tells me. 'What about jobs? What about the economy? And what about depression? If people don’t have that social interaction they will go insane.' I take her thoughts very seriously. They panic me and stop me in my tracks."